In Leonard Kessler’s children’s book, “Mr. Pine’s Purple House,” Mr. Pine owns one of the fifty white houses “all in a line” on Vine Street. There was nothing that distinguished Mr. Pine’s white house from all the other 49 houses. He decided to plant a pine tree in front of his house.  His neighbors (Mr. Gold, Mrs. Brown, Mrs. Green …) all admire the little tree, and the next day Mr. Pine wakes up to find that everyone on the street has pine trees in their yards. He decides to plant a bush next to the tree only to have everyone on the street copy him again.

Mr. Pine makes his big move and decides to paint the house purple. He finally finishes painting, and all his neighbors love it, which causes Mr. Pine to flail his arms and cry, “OOH, NO! NO! NO!  NOT FIFTY PURPLE HOUSES all in a line on Vine Street!’” His neighbors decide, however, to paint their own houses all different colors – their first break with conformity. ("'Yellow for me,” said Mrs. Green. “Green for me,' said Mrs. Brown.").

One of the first things one notices in the Cochabamba cancha or neighborhood markets are entire streets where vendors sell exactly the same products, in tiendas the same size, with the same prices and the same service. Why? “But wait;” you tell me, “there are subtle differences in every tienda.” You are right!

Henry David Thoreau said, “If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it’s because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.”

You and I know that one minute our children want to be just like their favorite music, sports or movie star, teacher or maybe even you. The next minute, they are non-conformists and yell at their younger brother or sister who has tried to copy them.

Your children need you to seriously guide them about whom they copy. What characteristics do you want your children to copy? Be careful! If you neglect this serious responsibility, the government, schools or friends will do it for you. What principles guide the importance of nonconformity and expressing individuality for your child? Be careful!  If you neglect this serious responsibility, the government, schools or friends will do it for you. How about us as parents? What standards define those individuals or characteristics that make up who we are?

None of us are perfect as individuals – nor are our marriages perfect.  As we work together to maintain our love and a strong marriage, our homes will be a good environment for growing and happy children.