“I am very, very clear when I tell my children something, but they just don’t get it! I’m in a hurry and can’t sit there and explain something 100 different ways until they understand! My dog understands me better!”  Have you ever said that?  It could also be to your spouse, your parents.

When I was in business and was asked to prepare and paint a vision for expansion of new business, new ideas or new markets, I fully understood the statistics of how the message would be received. Less than 14% of my managers and employees would understand and enthusiastically take up my vision – less than 14%. It’s no different in our families. No matter how creative and well thought out my instructions are, more often than not, my message is not received as I wanted. Do I give up in frustration? Do I abandon my job as a parent? Absolutely not! I love my children and know that what I am trying to convey is very important to them. My son quickly understands verbal instructions. My daughter needs the picture painted in several ways before the message is understood. My wife needs me to stop everything else that I’m doing, give her 100% of my attention, hold her hand and then say what I want to say.

A great example of communication is found in the Bible. Have you tried to figure out just how many different ways our Father in heaven tries to say, “I love you and have a wonderful plan for your life!” He uses stories, poems, commands, both good and bad examples … still He finally had to send His own Son, born of the Virgin Mary to live among us, die for us and come back to life for even His 12 best friends to understand. One never did! Does He give up on us? Absolutely not!!

Let’s understand that our children learn differently. Let’s have patience as we teach them. Let’s love our children so much that nothing will stop us from helping them learn. They are the creative geniuses of the next generation! When we’re frustrated with them, they know it and slowly a wall is being built between us. This becomes an extra obstacle we have to break through. Let’s be wall breakers rather than helping build walls.

None of us are perfect as individuals – nor are our marriages perfect.  As we work together to maintain our love and a strong marriage, our homes will be a good environment for growing and happy children.